Online Safety

What Does Your Online Behavior Teach Your Kids?

camm@momsmaterial.com — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 20:31:39 GMT

Have you ever thought about what you are teaching your kids about online behavior? Many or you may probably haven’t even thought about this, but it is very important. Our kids need to know about cyber ethics and the importance of your online reputation. They may listen when we sit down and specifically talk to them, but they really learn from watching us.

Bethan Tuttle wrote a post that made me think about the impact I am making with my own kids. They know I am educating parents about online safety through this site, CyberSafeFamily.com and my speaking engagements. Do they see me following my own advice?

I should take every opportunity to point out good and bad online behavior to my kids. I believe it is important for them to see actual examples. Thanks, Bethan!

Modeling Online Behavior for Kids by Bethan Tuttle

(originally posted at SecurityGeekMom.com)

Last Summer, my daughter and I were leaving a mall in Bellevue late in the evening. We had a bag of books, a bag of groceries, and a bag of take-out Thai food, and car keys in hand. On the sidewalk surrounding the mall, we passed a person who asked for money, and I said, “No, best of luck to you”, waited for traffic to pass, and then crossed to where our car was parked -close by & clearly visible.

My daughter said, “It’s good you parked here, because this place is super spooky.” We had a brief discussion about why I parked where I did, the bagger at the grocery asking if we’d like an escort to our car, etc. I modeled three safety behaviors and (what I consider) courtesy, without lecturing or freaking out my kid with statistics on women getting mugged near malls.

How do you do that with online behavior?

Incorporating modeling and transparency around a family’s online behavior is, in my opinion, very important. We really want to know what they’re doing online, and with whom, and yet – do they have any idea what we’re doing? Do they see what ‘friend requests’ we ‘ignored,’ the fit of anger we let pass prior to answering an upsetting email, or websites we avoid because they seemed sketchy?

Right now I’m sitting at my computer, a fantastic HP Pavilion that I love very much even though it’s old. My computer is on the dining table, across from my kids’ computers. This is the only place my computer lives when I’m at home, and while I’m working, typing, and reading, I talk:

As a parent modeling computer behavior, I am not ideal. I’m online too much, I work too much, and I spend more time on my social network than I do with my friends or extended family. To make up for this deficiency, I admit to it and talk about how work, non-profit work, and my own interests contribute to my over-use of computers. I make sure the kids keep their time online to a reasonable amount, and I make sure they prioritize friends, family, beach trips, and soccer over the fascinations of Fantage, pixeling, and CSS.
Check-out this cool website, guys, let’s see who made it.
Holy Cow, this person is so rude on Facebook! I’m not going to reply to her comment, because I don’t want to encourage her. I hope she’s ok, because she’s not usually rude.
Hey, please save your stuff and shut down, I need to run updates; I think we have some kind of network issue. Here, you can help me run updates.
Whoa, I have no idea who this text message is from, and it has an attachment; I’m going to delete it without opening it up. Did you know that your phone can get infected the same way the computer can? Crazy.
Ugh! This page is full of advertisements – I thought it was going to be a news article, but clearly that’s not their priority. Hey – look what happens when I hover over a link: I can see the preview of the URL it’s going to, and it is NOT what it said it would be: this link for “Afghan war” goes to a page with a URL that ends in ‘teeth whitening.’ That can’t be good.
Hey, this website wants to know how much money I make! Why would they need that just so I can check if they have a ___ in stock? I’m looking for the link for their privacy policy, I want to know what they do with my information…

About Bethan Tuttle

Bethan Tuttle is a happy mom of two living just east of Seattle. She’s the Executive Director of CommunityWatch, a non-profit crime prevention organization, and works primarily on issues related to crime prevention and information security. You can find her at securitygeekmom.com and @BethanTuttle.

Check out her website and follow her on twitter, she always shares great information!

Are you a good role model for your kids? Tell us what you do that is good or bad in the comments below.

Cammie Moise

Top 10 Internet Safety Concerns for Parents

camm@momsmaterial.com — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 09:49:26 GMT

When I decided to focus more on internet safety, I put together (with the help of SimpleK12) a list of the Top 10 Internet Safety Concerns for Parents. I recently shared this Top 10 list, along with my Online Safety Presentation, during a PTA meeting. As I was putting my presentation together I realized that I thought the number one concern should be inappropriate material. Based on my recent experiences within our home, this was certainly our number one concern.

As I spoke with other parents I realized they were having some of the same issues. Our elementary school embraces technology and just recently added iTouches, new Mac Computers and USB drives are on our school supply list. Our kids are able to search in the safe environment of our school (which is filtered and protected) but then they come home to use their family computer. Unfortunately, many of these home computers have not been set up to filter out inappropriate material. Some parents think their kids are too young to search for inappropriate material. But if you have been on the computer lately, you know you don’t have to go looking for this material. It comes to you! If you think that your kids are too young to search for certain words, think again. Find out what kids 18 and under are searching for in the article, Top Searches Norton Releases Kid’s Top 100 Searches for 2009.

MomsMaterial’s Top 10 Internet Safety Concerns

Inappropriate Material
Cyberbullying
Online Predators
Sharing Personal Information
Email, IM & Chatrooms
Sharing Pictures & Videos
Cell Phones & Wi-Fi Gadgets
Social Network Sites
Online Gaming
Viruses, Malware & Adware

Over the next few weeks, I will address these top concerns at my newly launched website that focuses on internet safety, CyberSafeFamily. Please stop by and sign up for email updates so you don’t miss any of the latest articles that will help you become a CyberSafeFamily.

Cammie Moise

GetGameSmart.com Helps Parents Set Up Family Settings for the Xbox LIVE

camm@momsmaterial.com — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 03:42:33 GMT

Recently I posted an article about online gaming, What Parents Should Know Before Buying Wi-Fi Gadgets and Video Game Systems for Kids This Holiday. I received a comment about the article from GetGameSmart.com informing me that their website gives parents tutorials on setting controls on Xbox LIVE.

GetGameSmart.com was started by Microsoft to provide parents tools and resources to help them choose the right games, content and online access for their families media choices. This is a great resource for all parents and I highly recommend you check out the site yourself.

Xbox LIVE Family Settings by GetGameSmart.com

To set Xbox LIVE Family Settings for your child, you must first create a Child Membership. Step-by-step instructions for creating a Child's Profile can be found at GetGameSmart.com. Once you've completed this brief process, you will be able to manage the following Xbox LIVE features:

Access to Xbox LIVE: If you decide to block access to Xbox LIVE, you and your family members will not be able to connect to Xbox LIVE to play games, communicate with other gamers or download content.

Online Gameplay: Before you can play multiplayer games online, you need an Xbox LIVE Gold Membership. Once in place, this option allows you to decide whether your child can play Xbox 360™ games online.

Xbox LIVE Vision Cam: You can control how your family can use the Xbox LIVE Vision Cam. You can block all child accounts from using the camera, limit camera use to friends only or allow full access. Additionally, if you experience any problems with gamers on Xbox LIVE using the Vision Camera inappropriate way you can file a complaint by visiting that users gamer profile.

Xbox LIVE Vision Cam:

   1. Select "Everyone" to allow your child to communicate using video chat with anyone on Xbox LIVE.
   2. Select "Friends Only" to allow your child to communicate only with people on their friends list.
   3. Select "Blocked" to prevent anyone from communicating with your child.

Privacy and Friends: You have the power to approve your child's online friends. Options are:

   1. Let your child communicate with anybody, or only with their friends.
   2. Decide who can see your child's personalized gamer profile.
   3. Decide whose gamer profiles your child can see.
   4. Control who sees your child's online or offline status.
   5. Decide whether other people can see your child's friends.

Voice and Text:

   1. Select "Everyone" to allow your child to communicate using voice and text with anyone on Xbox LIVE.
   2. Select "Friends Only" to allow your child to communicate only with people on their friends list.
   3. Select "Blocked" to prevent everyone from communicating with your child.
   4. No matter what the setting, your child will still be able to receive new friend requests for you to approve or block.

Content: Content controls help you set limits on the kind of downloadable content your kids can access including games, television shows, Netflix® movies and member-created content. You can choose to allow your child to search Xbox LIVE for downloadable game updates, demos and other content, as well as content created by other Xbox LIVE members.

With Family Settings, you can be sure that every member of your household is enjoying a fun and safe experience on Xbox LIVE. Visit www.GetGameSmart.com to learn more about the ways you can ensure your family has a safe and balanced gaming experience.

File a Complaint: If you encounter someone who breaks the Xbox LIVE Code of Conduct, you can file a complaint. All complaints are reviewed by Xbox LIVE. However, Xbox LIVE policy does not disclose the status or results of individual complaints.

To file a complaint, press the Xbox Guide button, then select the player's profile and choose File Complaint.

You can find the original article by clicking here.

GetGameSmart.com

This year Microsoft, partnered with over a dozen of the nation’s most prominent children’s media advocacy organizations, are expanding our public service outreach efforts with the Get Game Smart Campaign. The Campaign takes a first-of-its-kind approach to helping parents and kids establish healthy habits for playing video games, watching TV and browsing the Web.

Mission:
The Get Game Smart Campaign will inspire families to take simple steps to help ensure that kids are using media in ways that are safer, healthier and more balanced. It will encourage them to participate in a variety of both online and offline activities with chances to win prizes from Best Buy gift cards, to Xbox game consoles to a family entertainment system valued at $5,000. There’s even a chance for teens and their parents to become Ambassadors for the effort and have their own smart media habits featured in the campaign.

What Parents Should Know Before Buying Wi-Fi Gadgets and Video Game Systems for Kids This Holiday

Cammie Moise

What Parents Should Know Before Buying Wi-Fi Gadgets and Video Game Systems for Kids This Holiday?

camm@momsmaterial.com — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 18:50:03 GMT

Are you considering purchasing gadgets such as an iPod touch, Nintendo DSi or Xbox Live for kids this holiday season? If so, there are several things you should know before purchasing. First of all, please understand that I am not opposed to these Wi-Fi gadgets or video game systems. As a matter of fact, I am sure our family will be purchasing at least one of these as a gift this holiday. But parents need to be aware of the dangers and make informed decisions based on the maturity level of their kids.

Wi-Fi gadgets have the ability to bring friends together to play games and interact, even though they are in different locations. I know my daughter will love playing online games with one of her best friends that recently moved. I think this is a great benefit, but along with this, comes certain dangers that need to be discussed before she goes online. She needs to know what to expect, how to handle certain situations and our family rules. So what are the dangers?

These popular gadgets and games expose kids to inappropriate material, including pornography. In addition, gaming systems such as Xbox Live allow kids to interact with others online as they play games. If they want to play and none of their friends are online, they may choose to play with others they don’t know. This can expose them to inappropriate language including cussing, swearing, racist remarks and threats. Plus, recent reports are suggesting that sex predators are using these online gaming systems to find their next victim.

As I began researching this topic, I ran across an article from Mary Kay Hoal titled, Stranger-Gamer Dangers. Mary Kay Hoal is the founder of Yoursphere, a safe online social network site for kids and teens. I will follow up with more information about Yoursphere, but for now, I want to share this article.

Stranger-Gamer Dangers by Mary Kay Hoal

Moms and dads - the worry doesn't just rest at the doorsteps of social networking sites. Online games seem to attract those that intend our kids harm.

As reported by Aaron Diamant for Todaystmj4.com, "Sex predators have a new hunting ground. One you may not know even exists." The hunting ground he is referring to is online gaming...which is the way video games are moving. Kids can log online and play their favorite video games with other people all over the world. Seems harmless enough... but the real danger is that they can also talk to those stranger-gamers. Department of Justice Special Agent Eric Szatkowski was quoted in the article: "That's one of the risks of giving kids Wi-Fi technology-they can go outside the home and engage in communications that Mom or Dad might not be aware of."

This is a real danger. Diamant reported that a man was arrested in a child porn ring earlier this year, and that prosecutors say he contacted more than a hundred boys through the Xbox Live site. A convicted sex offender mentioned in the article allegedly solicited children in an online game while out on bail.

You might think you can keep tabs on who your kids are communicating with when they play these games online in front of a screen in your own home. But some handheld games like the Nintendo DSI are going online. It will be difficult to monitor who they're talking to when they're away from you.

My recommendation:

Sit down with your kids and have them show you the game.
See the live interaction first hand.
Understand the dialogue functionality (and hopefully limitations).
Learn who is in your child's team or in his/her raid group. (I asked my older son who loves online games to show me his favorite game capabilities from the time he was 14 and 15 and first started playing virtually. I even asked him to type in some expletives and other inappropriate words so that I could "see for myself" that the functionality was there).
Some games have parental controls that allow you to activate the "off switch" so your kids can't interact virtually with someone they don't know.
Don't accept that this is okay for your children and that you have no other choice. Hold the manufacturer accountable for implementing safety-first standards. Contact the manufacturer and require that they do identity verification and a predator check.
Dialogue, dialogue, dialogue.

About Mary Kay Hoal and Yoursphere

Yoursphere is the social network for kids and teens that puts safety first and provides a positive and age appropriate alternative to sites like Facebook and MySpace which were created by adults and intended for adults. I'm a mom of five, and after deciding to check out the sites that were so important to my kids, I was truly disturbed. I found hidden below the surface - that isn’t immediately transparent to every parent like myself - a landscape in these social networking sites to be inappropriate, and often times and in many cases, to be dangerous. I found a culture that focused on sexualizing our kids – either by encouraging them to post explicit photos, or by asking them in appropriate questions. I found that a culture of anonymity provided predatory access to our kids whether by a bully or a registered sex offender.

So, unlike other social networking sites, Yoursphere offers:

Identity verification, predator check, and requires verifiable parental consent.
Participation limited to kids and teens through age 18 (Teens can remain members until they turn 19).
All content is created by kids and teens for kids and teens and focuses on their positive day to day interests: sports, music, fashion, academics, art & photography and more. No worries about adult content. Kids can really be kids without worrying about conforming to an "adult" culture.
An advertisement free community. The (dime a day) membership fee, after a free month trial membership, allows Yoursphere to support its safety measures and provide activities, prizes, and rewards for every member without barraging them with ads.
Scholarships and support of youth-selected philanthropies: 3% of each membership fee is pooled into a scholarship program.
A network kids and teens will love. With plenty of fun activities, and only kids and teen allowed on the site, kids can be themselves, and mom and dad can have peace of mind.

You can Find Mary Kay Hoal on Twitter - @marykayhoal, Facebook, Yoursphere and her blog, Yoursphere for Parents.

Cammie Moise

Bringing us Back to the Basics of Online Safety and Security By Christopher Burgess

camm@momsmaterial.com — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 17:05:19 GMT

How was your October? For me, October was a spectacular month of change. In the Pacific Northwest where my wife and I reside, we witness the arrival of autumn and the usual adjustments to our life – temperatures slide down the Fahrenheit scale; rain arrives and rivers swell (some flood); and leaves begin their magnificent colorful transformation, literally right before our eyes, and then adorn our forest floors (or our yard). These changes require us to make minor adjustments to our daily routines in order to maintain a modicum of safety, health and comfort, i.e. our tanks and tee’s are replaced by sweaters; slickers and umbrellas adorned the hooks by the door, drains and gutters are cleared to more readily accept the rain and the areas of highest risk are protected with stacked sandbags; and, of course, the camera comes out to memorialize the leaves as they move through the individual spectrums of color and the rake comes out of the shed our lawns remain healthy.

It is fitting, therefore, each October the President of the United States declares October National Cyber Security Awareness Month (NSCAM). Here’s President Obama’s video “Protecting Yourself Online.” In his video the President touched on a number of key points:

Know with whom you are engaged online (the true identity with whom you are exchanging data)
Never give out personal or financial data without knowing with whom you are providing the information (the true identity)
Keep your security software updated
Be alert to Phishing email (suspicious email)

All excellent points, all amongst the most important to consider. I thank the President for his taking the time to address online safety and security.

So, how did you observe the NSCAM? Attend a seminar? Chat with friends or family about online safety concerns? Keep your software and configuration tuned? All of the above? None of the above? For my part, each day I tweeted a daily tip via my Twitter account @BurgessCT. I was especially heartened to see these repeated and was truly surprised to learn that upward of six million sets of eyes potentially read each of my 140 character “Daily Tips.” Each contained advice, guidance or simply food for thought on how you may keep you and your family safe online. None were highly technical, some addressed behavior and all were and are easy to implement. And yes, sometimes one or more of these tips crafted to ensure your family’s online safety and security may be construed as “inconvenient,” which from my optic is minor compared to the value I place on our family’s well being. So here they are (and yes I expanded each ever so slightly):

National Cyber Security Awareness Month Tips 1-31:

Passwords: Practice good cyber-hygiene – Passwords are like toothbrushes – you should not share them with others and you should change them often (every 90-120 days or when they are exposed).
Passwords: Like chewing bubble gum you don’t mix brands or flavors - passwords should follow the same philosophy and be used for one site only. To create a strong password use symbols, numbers and letters – never a word from a dictionary (of any language).
WI-FI: Home or Business wireless networks (WI-FI) – Enable WPA2 encryption with strong passwords. If your router does not support WPA2 encryption, time to upgrade that router to new technology.
WI-FI: Configure your router to suppress the broadcast of your Service Set Identifier (SSID) – why broadcast to the neighborhood your router’s ID?
Guidance & Direction: Guide your young. The internet is to receive information only and not to be used to share information. Only Mom & Dad share information over the internet.
Browser Settings: Web-based email (e.g. Gmail, Hotmail, etc.) configure your browser log-in to HTTPS (S=secure) and avoid having your password sniffed and grabbed when connecting via an open (not secure) network connection. Think of the wireless connection at your local shopping center or coffee shop.
Software Settings: Does your family use Peer-to-Peer (P2P) file sharing? Know your settings. A great technology, appropriately configured, use these thoughts from the Federal Trade Commission to assist you (Tips from the FTC’s OnGuard OnLine)
Computer Settings: Disable Auto-Run – just like putting your safety-belt on when you take your seat in the car, take a primary safety step and anti-virus scan all media being introduced to your PC, even if you received it from a trusted source, their USB/CD/DVD may be ill and contain malware/crimeware and why allow it to infect yours?
Software Settings: Software vendors offer you the option to accept auto updates – DO IT. While it may be construed as inconvenient, realize these updates from the creator are their means by which they close previously unknown vulnerabilities in their products.
Email: Phishing Scams – Guide your family to not reply or click on links within emails asking for personal or financial information.
Computer Settings: Administrator control? Who has control of your computer? Take control, set a unique password so that the computer settings can only be changed by the administrator, you?
Anti-Virus Software: Have it and use it! Auto update both the engine and the data. Don’t ignore warnings. Train your family to call out and alert you when a warning presents itself – don’t ignore these warnings.
Anti-Spyware Software: Have it and use it! As with Anti-Virus don’t ignore the warnings – Spyware is designed to capture your data at the point of entry or harvest your data from your hard drive – why allow it?
Data Backup: Regular data backup(s) should be a part of your security regime. I define data as photos, videos, music, documents, etc. Why? If your device (laptop, pda, etc.) goes down, your data is safe.
Malware/Crimeware: Be wary of ‘scareware’ pop-ups which announce your computer’s compromise and offering you their “free” software to remove – a tried and true technique to have you install malware. (NB: FTC v. Innovative Marketing, Inc., et al – an excellent read of the FTC's Complaint as they took action to protect you, the consumer, and took down a major purveyor of "scareware")
E-mail: If a retailer or vendor asks you to “email your credit or debit card data” – Say “Absolutely Not” and don’t do it.
Browser Settings: Do enable the “Pop-up Blocker” and “Redirect Disable” settings on your browser - this puts you in control of your internet experience.
Firewall: Have it and use it! Think of the firewall as your computer’s guard force – blocking external attempts to communicate with your computer which you haven’t authorized.
System Scans: Security checks for your computer – a list of free scan software from reputable vendors, courtesy of http://www.staysafeonline.org/
Public Computers: Use an internet connection at the library, airport, etc? Clear the browser’s history and cache’s when you are finished to remove “easy” accessibility to the websites you visited (and your personal data).
Electronic Media: Recycling or discarding media? Reformat or degauss your electronic media prior to recycle or discard. This will prevent inadvertent sharing of your personal or business data.
Computer Settings: Do visitors use your computer? Create a guest account with separate log-in for your guests so they have their own environment on the computer w/o access to your personal data or browser history or cookies.
Computer Location: For families, PC’s to be used in a central place – not behind closed doors. All can keep an eye on activities.
Online Friends: Talk to your children about the need to talk to Mom or Dad prior to meeting ANY online friends face-to-face.
Parents Online: Go where your children go online. Browser history will guide you; if history doesn’t exist or has been selectively deleted – time for you to pay attention. (SMS and browser logs on smart phones should also be reviewed periodically)
Chat rooms: Chat rooms are great for learning and sharing, children should obtain Mom or Dad permission prior to joining; Mom & Dad take the time to review and observe the chat room prior to green-lighting the activity.
Data Security: Consider encryption, with a robustly strong key phrase, for your important data (i.e., medical, personal, financial and private). Extend this protection to your data backups.
Chat rooms: Select user-ids which are age and gender neutral, as harvesting userid’s is a first step used by online predators in identifying their victims. “Pineneedle” not “Seattle1084”
Laptop Security: Do you travel with your laptop? Protect it! It is the gateway to your online presence, accounts and hosts your data. See the FTC's Onguard Online which has some great laptop tips.
Internet Connectivity: Know how your children are getting online – home, school, mobile phone, friends, library, etc. Craft appropriate rules and boundaries for each environment.
Reporting: If you believe you have passed your personal identifying information (PII) to a criminal do file a complaint with the FTC (http://www.ftc.gov/) .

Bonus 1: Think of online safety and security practices as a basic extension of your family security plan – no less important than smoke detectors, alarm systems, and how you and your children interact w/strangers.

Bonus 2: Do your children wear their Name, Address and Age on the back of their jacket when playing in the neighborhood? Then why post it on a website’s profile.

Bonus 3: Do you know where your data is stored? Knowing allows protecting. It is important to clear your temporary files and caches, regularly.
---
Online safety is important to me, please make it both important and a priority for you and your family. Going forward, I will craft additional pieces to assist you in keeping your family and loved ones safe and secure online.

I welcome your feedback, and as always thank you for your time
All the best,
Christopher

About Christopher Burgess

Christopher Burgess resides in Woodinville, WA. He is an author/speaker on intellectual property, intelligence, security, safety, education and awareness, with a focus on the online protection and safety of families, to include both the young and elderly. His published works (books, articles, audio pod-casts and video presentations can be found on his web page http://www.secretsstolen.com and his personal blog where he notes “I speak from the heart and shine light upon the many safety, security and humanitarian issues” can be read at http://www.veritate-et-virtute.com. Christopher is also the Senior Security Advisor to a Fortune 100 company, and can be contacted via his private email address: cburgess[at]att[dot]net.

Cammie Moise

Notice Something Different? MomsMaterial Adds an Online Safety Area to Website

camm@momsmaterial.com — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 20:23:22 GMT

Many of you know how passionate I am about educating parents on the latest technology and online safety. In order to share online safety information and keep parents up to date on the latest trends, I have added a separate section on MomsMaterial’s website. This section will include articles on topics such as online safety, cell phones, Wi-Fi gadgets, cyberbullying and cyber relations. We will also feature guest articles and interviews from some of the leading online safety and cyber relations experts.

I know that technology can be overwhelming and most of our kids know a lot more than we do when it comes to computers. But this doesn’t relieve parents from addressing the dangers our kids face online. I believe our young children need to be informed about what to expect and how to act before they go online. If you are looking for answers to questions such as the ones listed below, then stay up to date here.

How do I address inappropriate material and online predators with my 5-8 year old?

Is it OK for my child to post pictures or videos online?

What age should I allow my child to have a cell phone?

How do I decide if my child should be using a social network site such as Facebook?

What are some of the legal ramifications if my child is caught cyberbullying or sexting?

How do I teach my child the importance of their online reputation?

MomsMaterial wants to provide you with the information and tools to address these questions and many more. I want parents to know the positives and negatives of today’s technology. Technology is growing and changing at a fast rate. For example, yesterday I read an article titled 100 Ways You Should Be Using Facebook in the Classroom. This was geared towards a high school/college class but it illustrates my point. Many schools have incorporated using an iTouch and cell phones in the classroom. Teachers are interacting with the students like never before. It is up to us to stay educated and help our children navigate through today’s technology – the good and the bad.

Let me know what you think, what areas you want addressed, questions, etc. in the comments below.

Look for more articles coming soon!

Cammie Moise